Anorexia: The Rest of my Body

There has been a shambles, a shipwreck in my family.

I’m the little survivor, an unexpected seed which grew up badly.

Some people say: “I’m a warrior, nothing will be left after me”!

As an anorexic girl I would rather say: “After the shambles you made, would it be possible for me to develop, but I would try”.

All my strength was used to stand the strain of the lack of love from the only one I expected it from : my Mother.

If I were to compare myself to a living thing, I would be a poor plain-looking plant in a dark path, or a sea star missing a limb in a tidal pool.

“Amputee du Coeur”. Copyright Alice ODILON 2009. No clone is free.

I’m a survivor.

I’m an X.

Only the living rough X knows the way to exist in front of my Mother or other predators.

If we want to abridge this complex growing phenomenon, we could say, I drastically cut my body by removing my trunk and my head.

“Rupture de Coeur”. Copyright Alice ODILON 2009. No clone is free.

I just kept in my mind the trace of an empty cage sheltering non-existent innards and guts, a long time ago.

Then I kept my eyes, my mouth, my sex, but I lost my face.

Finally I matched my right arm to my left leg and the same on the opposite side and I got a cross.

A “body cross” with eyes and mouth on my oral face (stomach face – lower face), sex everywhere on my arms and legs, and anus on my aboral face (front – upper face) in the center of my pentagon body.

Finally an erotic holy body X, because if we consider the point of view of God, nothing else would be noticed on the Judgment Day, as guts that usually support all the pains of life are not taken into consideration and have always been considered as rubbish.

“Oculaire Cardiaque”. Copyright Alice ODILON 2009. No clone is free.

There I am: a living broomstick cross.

And if you have a better look at my limbs, they’re actually quite smooth and soft.

Photo retouchee de منتديات ستار تايمز

Sometimes my limbs seem swollen to intimate they want to be touched, as they’re so smooth.

Alice ODILON. 26 Septembre 2009.